I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
I just realized I haven't had steady access to a woman's body since I was breastfeeding.
I have a new drinking limit. I'll stop when I know I'm going to untag the picture that was just taken of me.
She just used a turkey baster to transfer alcohol from the glass to the bottle. Just thought you should know
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my phone cant type all the emotion im having
I negotiated the purchase of an entire tray of like 50 jello shots for $8.
searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
Just checked my phone. Sometime last night I googled sex positions in a tent. Was there even a tent there?
Most sexually ambiguous night of my life. Kept switching from the NBA finals to the Tonys.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She texted her brother about how much she loved his hot tub. He responded three days later that he wasn't aware he owned a hot tub.
For public speaking we have to bring an object that describes us to class. Can't decide if I wanna bring a flask or a shot glass.
I feel like a color. Like a wavy color
Hey my dad gave me life the least I can do is take him chicken strips and a pack of marlboros.
he had shaved armpits. I repeat: HE SHAVED. HIS. ARMPITS! First hookup of 2014 and it's with a weirdo. Alcohol:1 Me:0
Like I'm not tryna become president or marry a doctor or some shit here, like one level above garbage is all I'm asking for
Randomize