Found a waterbottle filled with a bloody mary in my purse this morning. Blacked-out me is always trying to help hungover me, it's so cute.
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
I took the precaution of putting my macbook the one place in the dorm there is no way i can piss on it... the toilet
She cut off the top of a watermelon and is now eating it with a spoon. She's more than half done.
My roommate threw his shoe through our window and I came out of my blackout kicking holes in my wall. Pretty sure Edward 80 Hands won't be happening anymore.
You are too young to settle down enjoy your life. The window to get drunk and have casual sex with strangers gets smaller by the day.
It was like the perfect storm of bad decisions.
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
got one for peeing in public....called the cop a donut dunking communist...should be a fun court appearance
Just cleaned someone else's sperm off of my bedroom wall. Never throwing a house party again.
Would I chase a raccoon with a flaming stick sober?
I'm attracted to him because he looks like the kind of guy who would lick my asshole without me having to ask.
Our sub is singing "i believe i can fly" after yelling at the class this whole time and this is really hella weird
She drank my rum. I had sex in her bed and didn't wash the sheets. We're even.
Randomize