I just realized that i have never seen about 30 percent of my friends sober before
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
Im drunk on a hayride surrounded by toddlers. they are judging me.
I feel like this is the moment of high where you have to write these texts down to remember to text them and feel that somehow this is important to the continuity of the world.
He screamed AMERICA, took a shot of vodka out of a Tupperware container, and then asked if he could see my tits
I found someone's tooth on the stairs when I was vacuuming, and my sister found a catheter in the men's bathroom... this cleaning job is dangerous
he told me it was nice to see me not blacked out mumbling to myself in the front seat, I told him it was nice to see him not in handcuffs.
Just remembered I railed lines while holding a puppy
If I could run through a field of Reece's and Oreos, dive off a milkfall into a bowl of cereal. My Life would complete.
I thought about mashed potatoes the whole way home
I feel better now, I have multiple fuck buddies again
The convent might be a nice break from real life
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
My brain is a dvd screensaver and I'm allowed to have a good thought when it hits the corner
This year my vagina is giving thanks that several of my cubs are coming home for the holiday
Randomize
