I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
Well, that's a 3 inch weight lifted off of my vagina
You just begged me to mute the porn and watch her ass bounce while listening to dubstep the whole time.
Bullshit. No way. If I brushed past your penis it was completely coincidental.
The good news is the house is clean, the bad news is someone redecorated the bonus room by spray painting "free willy" on the wall in honor of the girl who passed out in there last night.
Remember when I got my car stuck in my backyard?
Tonights drinking will be celebratory and victorious. Picture the end of The Mighty Ducks set to beer.
Nothing like grinding all night with a hot ethnic guy dressed as a clown to help conquer your phobia. Halloween is fucked up.
You know you are 86'd from the legacy right? You can't down shots then spike the shot glass
I want you to get your positive energy all over me. I want to to look like something from Ghostbusters.
You ruined me. I can't stop referring to everything outside as the "no-walls" ever since you showed me that video while I was tripping balls. My speech may be permanently altered for the rest of earth spins
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
I have like three friends I don't have sex with, what did you expect
Sorry 4 always trying to rope you into my sexual exploits
How in the fuck did you get LIVE MOTHER FUCKING BATS!?!?! Into my ROOM last night????
Randomize
