so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
Or they can chase TEQUILA shots with it. I don't know why my phone capitalizes TEQUILA.
..But I'm still alive. And thats the main thing
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
how did you know i stayed over last night?
there was a trail of glow sticks and cheetos from the front door all the way to his bedroom
You shall now refer to my vagina as patty and patty only
BUT YOU MUST FINISH YOUR QUEST
TO FIND THE HOLY GRAIL
AND GET DRUNK OFF YOUR ASS BY DRINKING OUT OF IT
I thought i didnt really feel whatever i snorted last night until i just realized i think i asked this dude to punch me fight club style
dude his girlfriend left the meanest shit just marinating in our toilet. I'm gonna have to snap chat this out, theres no other option. prepare yourself
This guy on the tube is sooooooo high. Eyes are bloodshot and he's licking his headphone cords.
Have you ever eaten pizza and gotten your dick sucked at the same time? Because I have pizza.
Lost my pants last night. Really need to stop taking shots of whiskey like I'm eating skittles.
Dude you were so wasted you thought a fake electric candle was real and tried to light your cig with it. Multiple times.
Randomize
