Hi
Babe...You're really smothering me right now
I wish i could convert my hornyness to productiveness. I would have written a fucking book by now.
what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
someone to text and fuck? since when does that constitute a relationship?
since 2006
I want to miss work tomorrow on account of violent projective vomit... Make it happen
Ok. I am hammered I will admit it but my legacy needs to live and your the only woman that could spawn satan. We need to talk.
Pretty sure I scared him off for good. The lesbian in me is ecstatic.
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
Sometimes I feel like I should become a beautician purely for my ability to shave pretty shapes into my pubic hair.
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
Pissing into the Grand Canyon is the single most liberating thing I've ever done in my entire life
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
She blew me while I watched the jets game and the hardest thing was deciding what to focus on more
As much as I hate to admit it, some day ill need a man because I can't open jars myself and you can't 69 a dildo
Like I don't even know how to respond to this?
Randomize
