Kiss
Puke
Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
I love you and want you to know that you're the best friend ever and me lassoing you with a seatbelt was out of sheer affection.
heres the thing, we have 120 cans of beer left in the fridge. until thats finished we cant fit food in the fridge
Someone asked me what I was drinking, I was drinking rum, but I was also eating starbursts so i told them "daiquiris"
Someone asked me why we were having sex on the porch last night. All I remember is him saying he wanted the recruits to see. This has got to stop.
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
Best part of having a window in your office is that you can leave through it when you shit your pants at work.
I wonder what chicks would think if they learned that when we add them on fb we email their bikini pics to each other.
did you just take a shot to penises and friendship?
I'm pretty happy on the couch eating Popeyes and watching Cops so if I go over there you better have drugs left
Dude if I had a dollar for everytime she asked me to do weird shit with her when we were fucking I'd have like 4$
She shit herself again. We're calling her the "Queen of Sharts".
Randomize
