Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
I have to decide between the hot young blond with no apparent gag reflex, and the brunette with a great ass and a trust fund.
Just found my girlfriend's stash of animated Japanese porn
And to think, I actually considered breaking up with her
She's singing So Happy Together to her burrito, I want to be on her level.
You NEED to fuck him he's a doctor with one leg. Are you kidding me right now. This will definitely make the list. Plus he buys all of us drinks.
I brought him to this party even though we're not together anymore because we made a bet on who would have sex first, and it is a sausage fest up in here.
This time, try to not get fingered in the middle of the living room.
I DIDNT GET FINGERED
I was rubbed
Found her with a stray dog now called champagne, crying about how she feels a mom now. Had to take her home. The dog too.
just filed my taxes drunk as balls. i may be going to jail.
Just had that moment when you realize the two drunk women shoving all their money down your clothes were your middle school teachers...
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
Yea i think drunk-me kept all my bar receipts, just to throw it in sober-me's face.
Guess I'll put him on my to-do list too. But closer to the bottom since we dated before. That's almost unethical.
I think he thought I was too drunk to handle his parrot
When we found you, you were half crying/half singing Taylor swift songs at 2am in the bathroom, and occasionally puking. I think I get "friend of the year" award just for putting up with your drunk ass all night.
Randomize
