Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
sober me hid the cigs from drunk me. sober me is a tricky bitch.
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just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
I know I am usually the slut but tonight it's her. She is being a slut, yes slut, T as in Tomorrow, U as in Uterus, L as in Llama and S as in Sangria. That spells slut, but backwards and that's what she is being.
Today might be the day that I legitimately throw up in my saxophone.
Theres dried jager, barbecue sauce and frie remnants all over my front seat.
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
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we're almost there. Shes pounding on the car window telling the nurse whos on a smoke break to fuck off.
had my ear almost bitten off in foreplay. the sex gods do not like me.
Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint
40 year old guy made out with me last night while I had French fries in my mouth
So then we ended up at a bar full of navy SEALs and I got one of them to take his shirt off, then I felt him up
I feel like 31-year old me is 21-year old me's hero
To describe how high he was he said, " I'm cocked out of my ape sandwich" so yes...that was some pretty good weed.
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