how much do you want to bet that her wedding invites will be vera bradley themed? loser has to frame theirs.
Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
Judging by her face, I'd say she's at least dabbled with meth...
Her bed looked like it had just hosted a water balloon fight. It was that good.
Just woke up with a blunt in each nostril and a lighter duct taped to my chest...good lookin out
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
How many vodka infused gummi bears count as 1 drink?
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
You can't be friends with my side piece. Conflict of interest.
We are so drunk half our team had to bowl with a chaperone. We won every game. We drink
Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.
Holy shit, I wanna ride him into the horizon.
Does the girl you just banged want anything from Taco Bell?
Im so sorry for peeing on your chest.
Randomize
