I just passed one of the bars and saw my mom kissing another woman. This can't be good....right?
Knowing your life, probably not.
wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
He told me that he wanted to break up with his girl friend but only after we had sex, only for him to make sure I'm worth it..
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
I am currently sitting on a candy bar to warm it up cause it was in the fridge so I can eat it while watching the last song and smoking weed by myself
in light of our recent drunken behavior, i think it's time we seriously consider hiring ourselves a babysitter.
We sat on the porch laughing about hilarious the sunrise was. And that we can do drugs again in the morning, thank god
I just woke up eating some beef jerky with my cat. I think she opened the bag for us.
We were suposed to have a 3some in their bathroom but it just turned into us 2 making out while he watched like a little kid on christmas morning
Selling our snow shovel to buy more beer. Not your brightest idea.
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
Best part about losing weight and not fitting into your pants any longer? They come off quick for chipotle emergencies.
These tits shall not be calmed
He was semi blacked out in the hallway with a bucket, calling for me while I had sex with his best friend in the very next room. Why do you let me do these things?
Randomize
