worse things have happened to me. but if it will make you feel better you can pay for my therapist sessions next week.
It's impossible to flirt with the bank tellers because they see how broke I am.
It'd be like medium rare by now.
I love how we're talking about your vagina like it's a piece of meat.
What would you say if I got first degree burns on my nipples from drinking coffee topless?
First funeral I've ever been to where the cops had to come.
I decided to buy a keg of Miller Lite instead of paying the electric bill. Just thought I'd give you a heads up...
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
I'll be home soonish I need 4th of July sex, it's the American thing to do.
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
bring the pregnancy test and the margarita mix, see you in 15
He usually doesnt care about me cumming but last night he really tried, I feel that him going to the Womens March benefitted my sex life
Where you been?
Please tell me this is a booty call
Live it up bro, they're always so surprised to find out you use magnums, being such a tiny man and all. It's a good thing.
Randomize
