im in a kiddie pool, high, with a keg in arms reach. If i had a sandwich and a blowjob this would be the best day ever
WE WERE REALLY IN A PORNO LAST NIGHT
How come I'm the only one who's around when people show up? I had just taken a shit, I wasn't wearing pants, phantom of the opera was playing and the fridge said PENIS.
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
It was around the time I started requesting "big girl straws" from the bartender for my jack and diets, that I knew I'd probably wake up with my sunglasses on and find my wallet in the shower.
found scuba porn. totally not sexy. life continues to disappoint.
The birthday girl is bringing her own barf bucket, it is going to be a good weekend.
So I stappled myself into my toga... that should be interesting getting out of later tonight...
I wish i could just live off of margaritas and good sex.
Well I'm going to San Francisco next weekend for pride. I'm sure I'll end up drunk and on a beach at some point.
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
I came in shy and timid. By the end of the night I hulked out broke two lamps, their coffee table, some plates, and still had sex.
holy shit I was not prepared for her to whip out that dildo
It's 4am & this guy is asleep with his junk still inside me..really rethinking my life
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