i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
There's too many weed/neon/felt Sublime posters in this room and someone just put on a Hunter S. Thompson movie. Save me, now.
It's like I'm the Little Bo Peep of sheparding dicks.
Only someone with your twisted mind could come up with that simile. Do you sit around and read 'How to turn Beloved Childrens Stories into Sexual Analogies?' This is the 3rd time you've done this.
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
who said I'd never amount to anything...i just won 'most enthusiastic' at my poledancing class
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
theres chocolate ground into my couch, nerds candy all over the floor and cocaine on every surface. great memorial day weekend and yours?
Shit, my parents are coming over and I just realized that a grinder is not an acceptable paperweight
this is the first time i'm angry at someone with so much boobs. she like managed to break my glass and my phone with one glorious swing
Things you Cant unsee: When your smartphone syncs to your dads laptop and downloads photos...including his porn stash.
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
Vomit your little heart out. You've got a long day tomorrow
I still can't believe a guy pooped in my backyard
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
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