I just saw the preacher from the church I grew up in while I was buying condoms at the drugstore... he remembered me.
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
whenever he goes down on me he looks at me and I just want to poke him in the eyes
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was cut off by 8, I need to rethink this breakup therapy strategy
We sat on the porch laughing about hilarious the sunrise was. And that we can do drugs again in the morning, thank god
No sexy Asian girl. No comfy bed. I'm just gonna lie here in the hall next to the garbage can until someone comes home.
If you want to borrow my flask for all future interviews as a good luck charm because your last one went so well with it in your suit pocket, just let me know
I went online and donated $30 to his walk-a-thon as a "sorry I puked in your bed last night"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The van in front of me contains people having SEX. I am in full view of a SEX VAN.
I'll pay you to write the paper but not for sex. You should only get paid for something you work hard at.
Before you jump in that vagina remember there's a reason we call her Infectonator.
So you're mad that I let you go home with the guy with soft hands but yet you can't understand that I was just trying to help you
idk i was trying to watch Fuller House and you got up out of a dead sleep, just in your boxers, said "no more Dave Coulier" and walked out to the living room and unplugged the router
I want you inside me. Finish your papers.
Randomize