And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
i'm watching the draft and making cookies. how am i still single?
Who's nuvaring is under my pillow?
That's actually a fantastic idea... The kinky sex dungeon will be vastly improved by the addition of a lightsaber
We left his house because I forgot how to drink water, I was just holding it in my mouth and then spitting it out, needless to say I don't remember the sex.
The night got interesting when the random guy next to us handed us a bottle of champagne and the rest of his ciroc bottle. When we asked why he did it, he proceeded to point at his friend who face planted the floor.
He asked me to fly out to Seattle to participate in a week of marathon sex so I'm at the airport now. I'll call you when I get back.
How ya feelin' champ?
Like a million bucks that was soaked in alcohol.
WTF ARE YOU DOING IT'S FUCKING VEGAN COFFEE IT'S MADE WITH NUT MILK YOU'RE NOT A FUCKING SQUIRREL.
You need to get out of there before he falls in love with you.
just threw up in a gas staton parking lot in front of a father and son. stared them in the eyes and finished like a boss
yeah, last night we handcuffed you and you started crying saying that you weren't a bad person
Randomize
