He has 250 profile pictures. Of course he was a douchebag
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
just tripped. bootyfest 2012 will be my engagement party. i saw the whole future. i'm moving to the beach.
promise me that when we are 32, we will look nothing like Kim Zolciak. Promise me right this instant.
Either you made a spaghetti vodka smoothie last night, or you puked in the blender.
i just remember explaining why my socks were better than everyone elses.
I sold weed for gas money to get home. I thought that's what college was for.
She just kept introducing me to people by telling them which of their friends I've fucked
His personality is sparkling but nothing beats his ass
He's a Shit stain on my heart
She kept grabbing my head and told my faces to stop shaking.. Also, she kept whispering something about seeing flowers in my eyes.
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
He called me at 4 a.m. and wanted me to drive him to McDonald's then drop him off at home. It wasn't even a booty call, it was a fucking chauffeur call.
He said he discovered the mysteries of the universe inside an orange... I want whatever he was on.
Why is there a pair of panties on my front lawn?
Randomize
