Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
All I want to do right now is burp, puke, and fart. In that order.
are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
Where else am I to apply my creativity?
I don't know. Anywhere productive and not involving sex toys would be a start.
I wish we were homeless so drinking on the streets was acceptable.
it took you forty minutes to realize it was a gay bar.
I realize now that I left my pants on that table in the downstairs bathroom at you house on Tuesday....
You tried taking his shirt off at the bar. He was 37 and married with kids.
My getting drunk and marrying a stranger in Vegas final court annulment papers just came in the mail... I might frame that shit
My absolute favorite part of last night was after I puked in the ally, we rounded the corner and you screamed, "she's ok!" and everyone cheered
Really because I got kicked out the eagles game for running up n down the steps singing ' fly eagles fly ' then punched a Dallas fan in the face before the game even started..
Seriously, this apartment is covered in body glitter. This chick musta been a huuuuuge slut. How do you get it across every surface?
Do you have any forwarding contact info?
THANK YOU for not letting me make out with that girl omfg I was one step away from a foursome in the handicapped stall
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
Also that boy who jizzed in me wearing Cowboy boots and a plaid shirt snapped me at 4 am and said "I owe you a dinner. Sorry"
Randomize
