Im at strip club and am horny
yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
I wouldn't really call it 'getting lucky' considering I paid her to do it.
Best idea ever: Giving hobos a beer and having a chugging contest to win another beer. Most fun I have had downtown in a while.
dude there's no way we're going back in there for your puke shoes
By the way when you were super fucked up last night, you ate cat food and tried to tell me it was healthy for you
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
It was one of those nights where you get back from the bar and end up staying up till 3AM beating off to facebook photos of girls from college
We were fucking in the boat on the lake when another boat saw us and honked their appreciation.
I definitely don't have enough experience with hookers to be in this group text anymore.
I walked in on a circlejerk after punching that guy out. Instant karma.
That was the best shit ever it was like an exorcism for my colon
that is very illegal...i love you.
You kept sayin "its alright, I'm pre-med" to everything we said. EVERYTHING.
The work outs are working. Someone just said my body type was “Tits On A Stick”.
Randomize
