Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
Dude turns out her best friend is lesbian...there is no wingman for this situation
did the fire alarm go off at the party last night I kind of remember a fire alarm noise
omg omg i ripped it out of the ceiling omg
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
I wanted to make out with that blonde just so I could deck her boyfriend and make things interesting.
At least that would be something.
When the strippers start dancing to Christmas songs it's time to get the fuck out!
I apologize in advance for the number of sex toys drying on the bathroom sink.
so in other words, they broke and fell off and I ate a gummy life saver off of his balls
I had my first "Damn Kids/When I Was That Age" rant at work today. We need to drink this feeling out of me. NOW.
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
I just got his Save the Dave and, to answer your next question, NO I AM NOT GOING TO THE WEDDING OF THE GUY WHO GOT DRUNK AND CAME ON MY CHEST.
And the last thing I remember was you in the bed with the german guy screaming "wrong hole" I laughed n passed out
He showed up completely drunk with a 30 of PBR and ten cans of Spam. I like this kid.
He gave us beer and shots and made us pizza in his brick oven before firing a handgun into the air to signal it was time to give us a ride in his inflatable raft to the bars.
He's like a mythological figure
Randomize