Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
i bet if teenage jesus was here he would do a shot with me
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
so we have officially lost him as of 7 hours ago.. already called campus security, the drunk tank and the hospital. figure he'll turn up eventually..
i'll start checking the bushes on campus.
Thank god the bicycalist i hit was on drugs
Just so you know, you're MY booty call. Feel degraded.
just did a beer bong in the shower while i was taking an actual shower its officially football time
There are pre-booty call contracts for a reason. I have no intention of calling you tomorrow.
Do you need my fax number or something?
He asked me not to hook up with anyone else because it would hurt his feelings.. while his arm was around his pregnant girlfriend.
I'm treating this like a real date. My boobs aren't even out.
I'm so proud, I have tears
He was licking my ear while recommending that I shop at IKEA. I think he's my perfect guy.
Why were you naked on your bathroom floor?
It was a "get entirely naked to take a shit" kind of blackout I think.
nyquil+orgasm=very intense and oddly interesting
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
Do NOT. I repeat. DO NOT call me little one after we have fucked. In no world is that ok. Even jesus agrees.
Randomize
