I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
i should go to a nude beach and wear just a condom, then ill have tan lines on my dick
im just sayin im driving an hr to pick her up, just cause shes your gf doesnt mean i shouldnt be entitled to a bj
So howd u manage to get high at a one year olds birthday anyway?
I am not ready to suck todays dick. Todays dick just laughed and came on my face.
Curse you and your alcoholic milkshakes.
You're welcome.
he said good things come in small packages and I decided to hook up with someone else
I most definitely just found a video on my phone that I accidentally took... You can't see anything and all you can hear is me talking about how good your water was... And then I fed it to you... And used the word "eloquent" to describe it.
I'm really hot. went tanning and this cheeseburger shirt like isn't breathable
Surveying the reception hall and I'm fearing the worst possible thing that could ever happen...this might be a dry wedding.
.,.,you might have to leave
SO AWKS THEY ARE HAVING A COUPLE FIGHT AND I JUST WANT PIZZA
We broke up. And I told him he better give me my fucking star wars movies tomorrow. Priorities.
I fucked a French man last night. 5 Times. Ashed my cig in his cactus. That later set on fire while we were having sex.
my comprehension of H.D. Thoreau really dives after 8 beers.....
It will astound me if they ever let you graduate.
I know you want to take a pregnancy test, but could you wait until Sunday so it doesn't ruin our weekend
Randomize
