Do you have a straightener and are extra lubricated condoms not the norm?
so after morning sex, she rolled a joint and turned on sports center
you might have found the rare bro goddess. i thought they were myth
Literally just stood in the shower and forgot what to do. that hungover.
She started to rub her ass on my shoulder and i instantly thought "i am going to get E. Coli"
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
Saw a guy pass out and hit his head on a urinal. Laughing too hard to help him up
I started sorting laundry at 6 am. He finally got the hint and left
Does saving a line for myself for the morning so I don't seem hungover at work count as responsibility?
Adult decisions.
I'll be so proud. Like a proud mama bear freeing my slut cub into the wild.
The best part about living in a college town is the annual rush of senior girls who want to get in their lesbian experiment before they graduate.
I almost got on a bus to Langley Air Force Base. 99% sure that's not where I wanna be.
That was years ago. And it was chlamydia.
I apparently asked the bartender for a plastic bag and told her I was gunna puke then grabbed two handles from the bar then put the handles in the plastic bag and left.....
Okay, so is being determined to have my vagina licked by a woman on Valentine's day an acceptable goal?
I'm still mad from all the stupid shit he's done this week that even though I couldn't give two shits about Vday, I'm gonna throw an epic tantrum if he doesn't morph in to Nickolas Sparks for a day
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