i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
after a month anything with tits is on the radar
I'm gonna answer everything she says with 'cum on da face' until she breaks up with me...great idea or greatest idea?
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
He felt like a one man threesome
Apple Jack is not a good idea for breakfast. Whiskey can't replace milk.
Your scrotum should have touched every square inch of that place by now. Start with the water fountain.
She said that I needed to "pregame her so it can slip right in."
That poor kid, I literally invited myself over and took advantage of him.
yea I'm sure he was really upset some drunk girl showed up to fuck him.
Do you have to put it that way?
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
The a/c is broken so they cut a softball size whole in the freezer door. Goodbye deposit.
No, trust me. Falling down the stairs is a fucking sobering experience.
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
YOU GAVE HIM A BLOWJOB ON YOUR DOORSTEP?!
I made out with a guy because he ate a grape lollipop and he tasted delicious... not my proudest moment.
Randomize
