i just saw a foot job.
porn is incredible...
is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
Just spun two beer bottles and Placed them in my pockets perfect... I feel like the clint eastwood of drunks
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
He burst into tears while I was blowing him. NEVER giving a bj for a graduation present again.
good news: I made it out of bed and into shower. Bad news: I made it back to bed without clothes. Worse news: I don't know this bed.
Just traded the drive-through guy at BK a Dos Equis for a Hershey pie before noon... win?
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
I found a picture of me as a little kid with nothing on except a towel covering one of my nipples and I'm glaring at the camera. Literally nothing has changed except I have boobs now
I didn't want to have shaved for no reason, so I told him I'd blow him if he would just come over and appreciate the smoothness of my legs.
I just ordered a onesie on amazon in the back of the ambulance while my patient was sleeping. I'm an adult
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
Is texting an old booty call with "can you still get your ankles behind your ears?" an appropriate way to reemerge into the singles scene???
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
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