Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
I'm looking for sex. Do you know her?
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
I'm sitting in the drive through at Mcdonalds right now watching the workers pressure wash the vomit I left from last night.
He asked what my name was on facebook chat. IT SAYS RIGHT THERE. i will never be drunk enough for this guy.
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
both the worst and best vomit ever... it was extra chunky and thick cause of the sausage... but it also tasted like delicious sausage... also cause of the sausage
Pack light, we're going straight to bar from the train. No place to put our shit.
Dude all I'm bringing is my dick and a phone charger.
I knew this night was headed for bad when I was drinking cherry bombs out of a sippy cup in the shower
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
"What's your dick like homie" is not really an acceptable thing to say out loud
I would rather her be sleeping with someone new than getting to go Harry Potter world before me...
When Dad gets to your house, ask him about the sound of anal beads. Happy Thanksgiving!
Until you've snorted cocaine at 6am before your nursing school clinicals birthing babies you're not on my level
Met the hot new neighbor. She's into country music and giving really good bjs. Latter made up for the former.
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