lets hang out tonight and do stupid stuff.
Dating you for 6 months was stupid enough. But thanks.
Just walked pass a bum on the way to a coinstar... awkward
you make it seem like sunflower seeds and pinot grigio are not in the food pyramid.
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
Ive decided I'm sending thank you notes to all the bars for graduation.
Nothing like cleaning out your cleavage from lunch, finding cookie crumbs and eating them...
I'm gonna take a nap by the fireplace and pretend like I know what day it is.
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
And I'm bringing my coffee cup of wine.
This dude has batman tighty whities on over his cargo pants and he has the nerve to yell "fuck you bitch" up at my window.
We should try to put a bagel on your penis
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
Randomize
