what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
i barely touched his dick and all of a sudden he yells, "BONER!"
I FOUND THE PROF I'M GOING TO FUCKKKK.
Just saw some airport workers running through the terminal with liquor bottles. That's my kind of emergency.
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
Hey we need to step our game up. Dad has us beat; he stole a vending machine once.
There's a really old guy here with a really young girl. I'm guessing he has to make choo choo train noises to get his dick in her mouth.
Can you explain to me why there are fake boobs glued on my chest?
Don't blame me. I told you I didn't know if I had a key to those hancuffs.
is that a sigh of girlish delight, or "sigh...I'm having a herpes outbreak'
Can't it be both?
But I did discover that he's totally okay with going down on me while I eat taco bell so that's a plus, right?
At the bar in my pajamas again
Ummm that is the 3rd time this week and it is Wednesday
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
Sitting in a music store. There is a 40 something year old guy in a track suit, with a boner, and playing the ukelelie quite intensely.
thanks for thinking of me.
i need to get drunk because i'm an angry sober
Randomize
