The cops found weed in michael jacksons house today...it makes up for the child molesting, I like him more now.
i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
man i wonder what i would be like if i had never started smoking weed
Just drive me around campus, I will be able to smell their innocence.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can always tell its time to do laundry when my vibrator doesn't stay covered up in my sock drawer.
That is correct. I did in fact somehow pass out in the tanning booth for over an hour. And yes the attendant did have to open it up and shake me awake.
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
He fell on top of me at a party. I slept with him a week later. We've been fucking for 2 moths. Most successful relationship ever.
I'm to the point where I'm fantasizing about Iron Chefs going down on me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
there's cocaine on the ipad again........... was your sister here last night?
i sent him a nude and he responded 6 hours later
what did he say?
"oh m god,,, whow '!!!!nm"
Cancelling your gym membership calls for alcohol.
I know EXACTLY where things went wrong with her...I didn't use Cheetos as a wooing tool.
Somehow reaching for the flaming hot cheetos ended up in the best sex of my life
Drunk twilight is the only twilight
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