dude I went to cubs game with my mustache, aviators, and a hooded sweatshirt. Do you think it was irony or fate that there were four 17 year old girls in front of us?
i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
Went to mcdonalds... Wishing I could throw up the last 20 hours of my life.
So the weirdest part of it all was he whispered in my ear "can i eat you out on your tredmill?" I dont find him attractive at all anymore
this will be a night to untag.
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
Girl walking by was talking on the phone about how he needed to write a gratitude list in her letter to god this week. Too stoned
can't decide if i look like a hooker or a missing member of Poison today
bro, your right, i shouldn't feel embarrassed about taking shots from a penis-shaped ice sculpture
Nope my penis exudes pure oxygen in times of crisis.
He wanted me to blow him while he did curls and looked at himself in the mirror. Not sure if gay or ego maniac.
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
We watched playoff games and fucked so we could both see the TV. I've now found true love.
Nothing like a near-death experience to start off your Thanksgiving...
She blew me while I watched the jets game and the hardest thing was deciding what to focus on more
Randomize
