There is a stranger person in my roommates bed...
how soon is too soon after the break-up to ask for my condoms back?
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
just puked in a purse in the store. some girl asked if i was gonna buy it now and i laughed and asked her why id want a bag some dude just puked in. her face looked like she saw the devil.
everyday i become more and more impressed with my facebook stalking skills
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
I just imagined your drunkass eating Taco Bell in my living room. This is the Godmother of my potential child.
What happened to "I wouldnt even touch her with a ten foot pole"?
Her vagina devoured it.
If I don't get my shit together, I'm going to be one of those really fucked up cases on 1000 ways to die
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
It was big, black, and had a smiley face tattooed on it. It was the perfect penis.
His new girl is probably classy and boring. I bet she doesn't feed him sour patch kids while she wiggles his weiner.
I was out of breath when we were getting started and he offered me his inhaler so he's a keeper
Good, but still not as good as the guy I banged in the ball crawl
I'll bring spiced rum
I am not drinking that devil juice
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