Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
I just made this asian woman on the boardwalk that was giving 20 dollar massages upset after I asked her if a happy ending comes with it.
Remember that one time i smeared period blood on your face?
I hate you
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
My entire summer has consisted of being too drunk for this shit, too sober for this shit, or too hungover for this shit.
I tried to roll down the stairs in a ball. I have bruises, the pain is too much.
What the fuck, why would you ever do that?
Haven't you ever just wanted to be a ball?
I found his Linkedin the day after he created it. Too stalkerish or just right?
I don't care how hungry or impatient you are. the highest setting on the microwave is 100% and you better not take it appart to add power. This is not the Enterprise.
No it's ok I've been talking to the girl at the Chinese restaurant about your dick for the last 20 minutes. I haven't mentioned your name but she thinks she knows you.
I wish I saved his nudes so I could anonymously submit them to his tumblr
I just got a job offer for Australia. Unfortunately I have given the name of Whitney
Don't go to jail over some guy named Bunky
I know he’s married, but he’s still a guy with balls and a dick. He noticed my cleavage and stared at my ass. He’ll call.
Randomize
