didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
Just had my ass outlined on a bar top with permanent marker and then they carved the imprint into the wood with a knife. I'm famous in the country!
The chick I hooked up with last night is my girlfriend older sister. Who is in town visiting. Who I just met. Who I just had dinner With. Who is here along with their parents and the whole family. How did my luck get so bad?
I went from innocently day drinking to waking up handcuffed in jail. Fuck you game days
I just saw an appointment in my phone called "it's been a month" I think I drunkly did that after I slept with Paul to remind myself to check if I got knocked up... I'm smarter drunk than sober.
Crazy how fast a room full of drunk teenagers sober up when someone breaks his parents' new flat screen
Look, I'm just saying... paying ur respects to the neighbors who had a death in the family with food u steal from the neighbors having the cookout may result in a negative karma situation.
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
IM TRYING TO BE RESPONSIBLE AND ALL I WANT TO DO IS FUNNEL CHEAP BEER AND SCREAM ABOUT HOW MUCH I LOVE OUR NATION
HOLD ONTO YOUR PANTIES AND SAY GOODBYE TO THE REMAINDER OF YOUR INTEGRITY
After he finished he sang his college fight song like it was some victory
Any time you've had a failed relationship, I blast No Sex for Ben by The Rapture and dance around my room. I wish I was joking.
I'm good. But Nutella doesn't taste as good as it used to.
Well hell, he's gotta sleep in the bed he's made. Multiple times. For multiple girls I'm sure.
Randomize
