I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
I called her new haircut "lesbian progressive" and now she's upset
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
I'm going to do lines of vitamin c I cannot be sick for halloween
Dave used his AAA card to get my car towed to my house so I could get drunk. Evil genius.
You definitely in your drunken state were really concerned you would forget to buy milk today
Im rolling face in a pizzeria. I want to be with people who love me.
This is where you say "Why yes we will drink with reckless abandon and hopefully not be in a church parking lot again."
Finding that toy duck there was weird right?
Today is National Blunt Day in the Great State of Me. Come ovah
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
I'm about to order this penis-casting kit so text me within 5 mins if you're not down
It was a frighteningly large penis to say the least
I'm getting 800 nuggets from McDonald's
I think I achieved my goal of being high for 24 hours in the same week I promised myself I wouldn't smoke anymore
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