if i get an abortion, then will you go out with me?
im watching shaqs comedy special. this is how i know im not sober.
i'm crying at olive garden. i've hit rock bottom
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Definitely almost got hit in the face with a baby
I swear to God, I just heard my guardian angel tell us to stop. I think we should listen.
I need the number of a restaurant that delivers, has lock-picking abilities, and is okay with full frontal male nudity. Entirely too hungover to get out of bed.
It's like someone is grabbing my scrodum with pliers and just hanging there.
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
umm, I just masturbated to old Justin timberlake on MTV jams. in need of dick ASAP
Let's just say we ended up at Denny's with a strippers shoe that we had to discreetly leave at the door to the strip club this morning
Your normalization of crazy is frightening.
Kyle passed out in the tub after breaking a glass and shouting, "WHAT ASSHOLE GAVE ME A GLASS?" His girlfriend gave it to him...
As I walked across the lawn after the party got busted, an officer told me to chug my beer before I left the premises.
I'm the one who said we should take things slow. I'm also the one who forced him into the back on my car so we could have sex.
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