She was crying and singing Taylor Swift on repeat. I'm never drinking with her again.
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
I called her new haircut "lesbian progressive" and now she's upset
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
I may wear a condom to jerk-off tomorrow knowing that my hand has touched surfaces in this bar.
I noticed a trail of vomit coming up the drive way. You must be home
"This must be what Jayden Smith feels like all the time"
lets go to sea world and you can just hit on every guy in a wetsuit until you get lucky
So I have been told that I licked your eyebrows last night
I'm pretty sure ignoring the person that just sent you a picture of their boobs is bad nude etiquette.
I put on that one song on Titanic so he'd fall asleep. When I was positive he'd passed out in a drunken fit, he outstretches his arms and says "I'm flying, Jack.."
She grinded so hard on my face that I've got rugburn on both eyelids
He kept apologizing that the nerve damage makes him take a while to finish. Meanwhile he gave me 3 orgasms and a leg cramp
Only you could benefit from a reckless driver
I'm not saying it wasn't great. I'm just saying sleeping with a gassy, depressed,45 year old mother was a different experience. Would do it again though.
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