Apparently last night I sat at the bar with an upside down sharpie lightning bolt on my forehead, yelling "It's Harry Potter's birthday! Let me be on the qudditch team!" And I kept calling the bartender Dobby. There are videos.
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
My pussy is not your playground.
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
She had her laptop open and there was microsoft word opend and all was written was "no italianoo"
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
I got out of bed with her to go smoke a bowl with her roommate which was fine but I passed out when I went upstairs to take a piss.
Yeah.. she's probably not gonna call.
We've started doing pot butter shots. WHY AREN'T U HERE
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
He was so hammered. He called the cops on the landscapers he thought they were trespassing. 2 were arrested on warrants.
Last night at the bar you we're seriously going up to people and pushing through them like they were bowling pins and you were a bowling ball
Apparently "Welcome to the Sin Cave" is not how I'm supposed to answer the door
I just had drunken sex with an eagle scout behind the boy scouts of america building. what has my life come to?!
Oh fuck, I'm officially a cougar..he's got the same name as my grandson
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
Randomize
