She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
I feel bad for the person that has to clean the dishes that I peed on last night.
whenever I think of his sister, I just picture a chick with a huge beard
And on that day, Satan said; "Let there be the friend zone and let us get fucking high." while Jesus silently cried in the background.
Indeed. Apparently I called my sisters and told them I wouldn't get arrested because it's not a real sword.
New one-upper goal: I have to shit off the side of a moving train then jump off
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
Nothing more ironic than raw dogging some random Asian hottie last night and then doing the walk of shame home from her place mixed in with the participants of the AIDS walk
He wasn't excited for the fifty shades of grey trailer, so I told him we're done
Omg this place. I'm at a neighborhood party. My mom has kissed two other moms. Where am I
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
It's taking every bit of my restraint not to go to the store and buy chips and cake and like steal someone's dog. PMS is so weird.
Baked out of my mind. Went in the bathroom, a daddy long leg spider and a carpenter ant are battling it out on the floor. I brought my computer with some dubstep.
OMG THE ANT WON
Sorry you saw my balls. Pregame includes a lot of shaving.
That chick keeps sending eggplant emojis
Welcome to dating in the digital age. Better catch up now that you’re divorced
and eggplant is code for penis. It means she’s DTF. Go get her tiger!!!
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