Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
They should really pass out barf bags in church
She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
There's a man in a pair of gray footie pajamas and a paper crown watching the kids at the playground. It was easier to tell who was a pedophile before Where the Wild Things Are came out.
He IMed me 5 times, before my homepage even loaded. This is not gonna work out for me
i got really high and listened to the spongebob squarepants theme song and, i swear to god, it was in german.
So it turns out there are pros and cons to having a broken wrist. Pro: I can give amazing blowjobs with my left hand. Con: I just had to open a packet of crisps with scissors.
At what point would you like us to save you from yourself?
Can I just put my face in your boobs and forget the world?
...I can smell the alcohol on your breath through that text
My usual answer of have sex with it doesn't work in this situation
We just won 1800 at the casino and are going to the strip club. Who gives a fuck if it's 5pm
I'm floating on a 30mph cloud right now not giving a fuck
Fuck these bullshit days. My underwear are still inside out.
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
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