We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
He fell off a seesaw, tore half his ear off and somehow convinced the paramedic he was allowed to have a beer while being treated
asked the cab driver where he learned Swahili last night.
Ok now a guy in a winnie the pooh costume is grinding on some chick to the song shots
Clearly my hormones are sending beaming lights to every penis in the area
you were passed out so I asked you what my name was and you opened your eyes and yelled "ricotta cheese"
no way
that's when i decided you were gonna be okay
Apparently I still called the officer "sir" despite the fact I was at a .21 BAC. Southern girls are raised right
What do you mean you don't want me to steal the manikin do you have any idea how expensive inflatable dolls are I can't get that for your birthday
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
I don't know, I think it's at least a minor achievement when you can light up with the guy who took your virginity and act like you didn't have and incredibly awkward sexual experience together
I thought 5 times was beyond my capabilities but her tongue was like a penis defibrillator. Clear!
I woke up with my shoes still on and my pants around my ankles cause I couldn't get them over my shoes
So if I run into you on the street, I'm supposed to just stop drop and suck your dick?
Today will be the day I throw up in my backpack in the middle of class
Randomize
