Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
video games are the ultimate cock blocker
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
Idea for the cake. Joints for candles. Do it.
Smoked a joint and chugged some pepto. Feeling a lil better... Not sure which is working..... Gonna keep doing both.....
Some people say 6pm is too early to get drunk. To them I say this dinner is delicious.
OH MY GOD IT'S LIKE SHOOTING FISH IN A BARREL, EXCEPT INSTEAD OF FISH THEY ARE FIGHTER PILOTS
somehow this went from sexting to explaining my eating disorder.
You're wearing a hospital gown and pearls. Let's reevaluate your life.
Well, I just bought plan b with the tips I made from the job that I slept with my manager. So yeah, that's my life. How's yours?
What kind of sociopath goes to sleep at 9pm when I clearly need attention
I wore my lizzie mcguire socks to the bar last night. Because that's how i get all the ladiez
That's nice of you to be concerned, but I'm pretty confident I'll marry someone 30 years older than me, ride out being the trophy wife for 10 or 15 years, then live large!
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
Randomize
