do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
Just bought myself a coach diaper bag. I thought it would be perfect for school. the baby bottle holders are where i'm gonna put my booze
she kept her crown on the whole time i was giving her birthday sex
P.S. I just watched The Muppets. I feel like I just got a sadness enema.
she said i was like a little lamb and she felt bad for luring me into her den of sin. then she blew me.
Being a virgin isn't supposed to be this easy for you.
Put it this way, at one point I was getting stoned on the roof of the strip club with one of the strippers while another one gave me a free lap dance. That wasn't even the best part of the night.
IT'S LIKE SHE TAKES SECRET KUNG FU CUNT LESSONS AND THEN BRUCE LEES ALL OVER EVERYONE.
Why is it so hot and why are these the only pants in my life.
You in for a dick vacation?
YES, even though I have no idea what that means
Speaking of church, everyone showed up to lunch in the dining hall in their Sunday best and I walk in looking homeless bc I just got out of bed. I hate this school.
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
I feel like we need to find him and explain that if the two of them would just fuck he'd understand.
My greatest accomplishment today was eating a box of Thai food the size of a toddler.
Doug the spinning teacher gave me chlyamdia
Just had to read the instructions to my microwave. How am I so high?
Randomize
