wat bout pragnant strippers??
It only happened twice. Once we used extra virgin olive oil and once I used saliva and brute force.
so the sex was amazing up until the point where she said "wow, you're even better than your dad!"
you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
He was in me and said I can't believe this happened because of facebook. MOOD KILLER.
you finished all 5 burgers, started crying tears of joy, and then claimed the tears were actually just 'meat sweats' from your eyes
not sure how we got back down, broken rib says we didn't use stairs
The entire time I'm blowing him she's in the back seat lecturing me on the reasons why you're not suppose to do that while they're driving...
we drunkly made out in the middle of the street beside the homeless guy playing the flute. Not how I imagined our first kiss.
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
No, supporting your unemployed boyfriend IS NOT what credit cards are for.
I'm highly inebriated watching star wars, this text was sent via the force
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