god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
all i remember is stealing his cheesepuffs and shaving my vagina in the hotel lobby
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
I come back into the room and you're grinding with the person in the mascot suit.
My printer just jammed because one of the condom wrappers I threw when we had sex in my dorm
the campus cop used the word depravity in our citation.
Come on, without my personality, I'm a pretty good one night stand.
I seriously think I got run over last night.. My sides are bruised and I got a ride home in the limo from the office.
Fucking in bar bathrooms doesn't count as "rushing things"
Yeah I remember doing the worm in my moms room. While she's yelling at me and I'm making seagull nooises
Reasonably certain my seventh grade teacher is encouraging me to drop acid on twitter
2014 decided to stick it to me one last time. Right up the ass.
Dollars spent: $83, Girls kissed: 4, Girls slept with:2, Girls currently making me breakfast: 1, Fucks given: 0
Apparently I drunkenly agreed to help the homeless. For once, I'm not disappointed in drunk me. Four for you, drunk self. You go, drunk self!
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
Randomize
