I think horse shit smells the best of all shits.
I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
Our kitchen sink faucet is leaking, so I set a pitcher under it to catch water for Kool-Aid tomorrow rather than turn on the faucet. The environment owes me.
We probably shouldn't have forced that guys cat to drink the grey goose while we were doing lines in his bathroom
I mean Grimace is basically just a big piece of purple shit and he is loved way more than the hamburglar just to put it into perspective
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
Left and drinking by a bar by myself. Everyone is in pajamas. I'm in a tuxedo. This is my life.
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
My team for a project is gonna have weekly meetings at a bar. yessss. they will do all the work while i thor hammer down beers.
Got head at the top of a water slide over-looking the valley while wearing a sombrero and drinking a corona. Epic.
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
So i had a feeling this dude with one leg in a wheelchair was following me around Walmart turns out I was right. He just asked for a picture of my feet.
i mean i let him but still...
Normally, it will inspire me to work. Today, it's inspiring me to masturbate.
I am far too sober to understand you right now. sorry.
Nothing like an afternoon walk of shame across campus on parent's weekend. Damn.
Randomize
