So, someone in Olympia stole my credit card # last week and bought a platypus vibrator with it. That’s it.
yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
You were asking people if they could pee on you while you shotgunned beers
Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
I think I can smell my own vagina right now
the worst part of it wasnt him peeing on the xbox. it was when he showed me his penis and made a kissy face at me. THAT was painful.
I just threw up in a patch of wild flowers on the side of the road. I never knew rock bottom was so beautiful.
i just got yelled at for having sex. this sorority thing is worst than being at home. at least at home they think im still a virgin
... why is there a bottle of pee on my headboard?
bro your seconds weren't very sloppy last night, is everything ok?
getting busted for public urination is like, a step above j-walking. you'll be fine
Because my vagina is Ellis Island. All foreign penises must be presented for inspection and competency. God bless America.
Going overboard is basically 75% of my personality
I'm a gorgeous hot mess
Why do I like him? He literally has no redeeming qualities.
Well, I ruined his toilet and he's still completely okay with me. Plus, it took him like a week to tell me.
If a girl I didn't love ruined my toilet I don't think I'd stick around.
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