i just realized Britney Spears and I are more alike than I thought. Both of us have our parents in complete control of our lives, we both have restraining orders on previous boyfriends, and we all know both of us can put on a hell of a show
haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
I think he just gave me the 'I used to sleep with your sister' discount
Nothing like an old fashioned, wine fueled, anxiety-cry in the shower to start off finals week.
It's 6 a.m. ... what the hell.
When you guys came back from the bar, I thought everyone was a T-Rex - Thats why i was hiding under the table. Never doing shrooms with Drunk people again
We are smoking a hash blunt ... Bring your emergency inhaler
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
her spring break bucket list included "break into The Swamp, blow him where Tebow has Tebowed"
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
Do you know how much wine is in a box of wine? Not so much an amount, but whether it will kill me if I drink the entire box this xmas
When you accidentally text the wrong guy for a dick pic and your surprised you get one In return. He just got on my "to do" list
Blow Jobs and the Patriots Playing I think I’m going to marry her
you're not celebrating your 21st birthday right unless you give a male stripper a hand job, flash the bartender, and win a free vibrator.
Are you hungover?
No. I'm hiding under my covers and hoping it doesn't find me.
Randomize
