I'm drinking ghetto ass mojitos!
Wow. How can mojitos be ghetto?
Squirt + bacardi limon + limes = ghetto mojitos
I unwillingly was the ball between four hungry hippos last night. I thought the one chick was actually going to eat me
he changed my name in his contacts to "rick", so his mom wouldn't know he was texting me
walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
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just woke up to a get well card i wrote myself when i was drunk. it was by the advil. i am a cocky bitch.
I'm not sure what happened last night but I woke up next to him and I was wearing nothing but my grandpa's diabetic socks, so I'm letting that fill in the blanks.
Downside to Halloween: you can't tell if the guy dressed as Gene Simmons from KISS that keeps flirting with you is hot or not...I decided to err on the side of caution and assume not...
Yeah I just don't know how I feel about my fuck buddy coming to work at my dads office with me.
The object of the game was to pour tequila into a sombrero and drink as much as you can before it leaked through, 'Big Papi' won.
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him and the cab driver we buy e from got into a fist fight, about which show is better, futurama or family guy.
Now some guy that's in my phone as " Alex lip ring hot" is texting me and I don't where life is taking me
I went to an 8am hookup in another guys sweatpants. Who is the really player here?
In other news, I just threw up my burrito and am currently on all fours literally crawling back to my bed
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
I FLASHED A GUY AT MCDONALDS FOR A FREE BREAKFAST BURRITO. IT WORKED!
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