Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
just woke up to overhearing her on the phone saying "yeah we fucked last night, that makes 42." should i get tested?
well i fucked her too, so yes.
I just packed a bowl in my room and use glad press n' seal to cover it so it wouldn't dump out in my pocket .
You going to have to be more specific than the night we blew an 8ball off the toilet..
You sat there for 20minutes trying to seduce the picture of my dad.
So stoned i forgot i was in bed
Not blacking out at our finals party is my Everest
I just traded 5 cigarettes for a sandwich on they greyhound.You owe me 5 cigarettes. I told you I would get hungry.
Just realized Ive never seen my f buddy in the daylight. What if he looks different?
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
For the record you're an amazing lay and you have great taste in breakfast sandwiches
I went to smoke a bowl and realized that my lighter is out and there's still frozen blueberries in my bong... I need to reevaluate my life...
The party pretty much ended once she shit on the couch
I need you to know I’m weirdly very sexually attracted to Charlie Puth now
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