Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
dude your girlfriend loves you alot..she yelled your name lastnight in bed
so whenever I text yeah my phone automatically corrects it to yeahhhheeehhyeahyeahh .. too much party in the USA?
We've only been driving for two hours and I'm already down 3 vicodin...I'm not going to survive this family vacation.
My life is a requiem composed in the key of fuck.
Maybe it's cuz you slapped him with a pancake last night
im pretty sure the clearest way to say "dont worry, im not emotionally attached" was by sleeping with his roommate the next night
i dont trust my judgment anymore so im only going to fuck guys who can donate blood at the red cross. they have standards.
Next time we include dessert condiments into our sex life we can fuck up my sheets. It's only fair.
i think you may have a shot to cock block in a moment. just saying.
Wake up an cock block please bc these are noises i dont ever want to hear again
The nun costume is coming back hard and it still has glitter and the smell of Vegas on it.
Best. Text. Ever.
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
THE FASTEST WAY TO MY HEART IS THROUGH FAMILY SIZED BAGS OF GENERIC BRAND CHEESE BALLS
If you could get me there thatd be perfect. I doubt there's extradition on the moon.
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
Randomize
