Yes give me all the cream and he's gone
At Coney Island the sign for the rollercoaster The Cyclone says, "Make sure your glasses and weave are secure."
"Party in the USA" was played at church youth group last night. It was like everything I enjoy hating was aligning against me.
she used her one phone call to ask me about my day
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
omg i met someone at the bar who sells hair feathers. that are long. saved in my phone as "haiirs deather"
like he said he was barking at you while cumming in your face
i think the theme of this summer is "shitting in weird locations."
I think you're too young for vagina rejuvenation but I guess you have never been one to listen. Sounds good! You bring the Percocet ill bring the vodka!
I climbed through his window to find him already with another booty call. This wouldn't have happened if I could upgrade from my 7th grade scooter to a real car.
…If I were you I wouldn't use that as part of your argument to your dad for a car
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The police report said "I asked the suspect if he had any identification. He replied yes and gave me a Pizza Hut gift card"
HE JUST ALLUDED TO FUCKING MY FRESH LOAF OF BREAD
After fooling around at the hotel til dawn, I managed to feed her with my free buffet passes. Tastes like sweet victory.
Also a shrinking boner emoji would be helpful
You tried to use him as a battering ram. I'm 99% certain that's why he left.
Started dabbing in blow again because he always hated that I did it. Yuh I’m doing drugs but at least I’m doing me?
Randomize